Joe's First Dentist Appointment

Joe went to the dentist for the first time this morning. Fans, he took the whole experience entirely in stride. Due to the torrential downpour, and the effort to get Clara dropped of at school, Ted to the bus, and Joe to the dentist all by 7:30am, the photography staff neglected to bring the equipment necessary to bring you some pictures from the actual event itself (i.e. a camera), but we will, as always, give you the blow-by-blow account.

Joe's dentist is one of these children's healthcare professional types who goes by her first name proceeded by "Dr.", but Dr. Amey is the real deal, and so is her staff. After Julie and Joe had toured the bathroom in the hallway outside of Dr. Amey's office*, Ms. Ashley took us back to a room with three small dental chairs in it. Joe clambered right up and took the sunglasses Ms. Ashley proffered. He consented to be only semi-reclined, and after a while, Julie's sense was this was because this position still afforded him a view. He was introduced to all of the instruments, including "Mr. Thirsty," the tool that sucks out the water squirted into one's mouth. You know the one, Fans. Then, it was time to pick the flavor of tooth polish he wanted for the teeth cleaning. Our Hero selected blue raspberry over cherry and cotton candy. And his teeth were cleaned! He was all, "Whatever!" While Julie and Joe waited for Dr. Amey to come over and give his teeth the once over, Joe explored the goodies in the goodie bag: toothbrush, toothpaste, and dental floss. The dental floss was definitely a highlight as he was permitted to unspool all five yards of it. Julie knows there is this much because Joe asked her to put it back in the box, and as they were still waiting for Dr. Amey, she gave it a go and managed to get it all twirled back up in the box.

Then, she was there: Dr. Amey. She looked at Joe's teeth and said something like "Lower two minus five space four. Red. 10-4." to Ms. Ashley. You know, when the dentist rattles off the dental lingo for teeth matters to the hygienist who writes it all down. What that all meant, apparently, is that Our Hero has a great looking set of chompers. And here's the best part! Because there are some nice, even spaces between them right now, at this juncture, we don't need to worry about actually using that floss Joe clearly views as a toy.

On one's way out of Dr. Amey's office, one is allowed to select a toy from a shelf with bins of various delights. Julie was still talking to Dr. Amey when Joe was led there by Dr. Ashley. When Julie rejoined him, he was busy stuffing as much loot into his dental goodie bag as he could, but was so excited about it, that he promptly took it all out to show Julie. Julie gently suggested he put back all but one so that Dr. Amey's friends who came later that day would have some things from which to choose. For sure the highlight of the visit for Julie was when Joe considered that, and then immediately started tossing things back into the bins, adding with utmost deliberateness, "We take two." That's what we call a done deal.

What did Joe select? A keychain with a basketball on it and--wait for it--a whoopee cushion. Ha! Which Julie blew up repeatedly for him after dinner and he squeezed or stepped on in between again unreeling the floss.

*This in and of itself was an event. Joe announced he was poopy when we pulled up to KinderCare at approximately 7:18am (the appointment is in another town at 7:30am, and it's pouring rain--you have to keep the timeline and the scene firmly in your mind to get the full flavor of the morning). But hooray! Joe has correctly identified a bowel movement. Awesome! We no longer change Joe on the changing table unless he requests it, and so to get the wiping done properly, Joe bends over and touches his toes--or, if you are in a public bathroom, the floor. Why not? Also, though he rarely deigns to grace the potty at home with his bottom (you know, the one where we have the kiddie potty seat), the potty in the bathroom outside of Dr. Amey's office--this one, this one he has to try. But will "not scoot back." (In relaying this incident to Ted, Julie learned he scooted back at Target this past weekend and fell in! This explains a lot, obviously.) And oh yes, hands will be washed not at the sink to which Julie has originally lifted him up, but the other sink. Naturally. Of course. Got it. After a stop at the water fountain (all the rage in Joe's world having met his first one in Mr. Adam's room at school), we were finally ready for why we were there.